


a winter of love

by bisexual-killian-jones (aelover867)



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: CSSS gift, F/M, Lieutenant Duckling, Winter fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-24
Updated: 2015-12-24
Packaged: 2018-05-09 00:12:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,035
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5518241
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aelover867/pseuds/bisexual-killian-jones
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Princess Emma hid her love for Lieutenant Killian Jones. But faced with endless suitors, will she choose her own love or a love to help her kingdom?</p>
            </blockquote>





	a winter of love

**Author's Note:**

> this is my CSSS gift for justren21! she asked for fluffy lieutenant duckling, so here it is! enjoy!

The snow fell steadily outside Emma’s window. She sat at the window seat there, looking out over her balcony, which overlooked the wide expanse of sea her country owned. The waves crashed against each other, the sound loud enough to be heard from Emma’s place high in the castle. She sighed deeply, wishing that only one thing would come over that horizon and arrive home.

But alas, life never did follow Emma’s wishes. So she waited.

She waited for that ship to come home, with its sails high in the skies and the waves crashing against its hulls. She waited for the crew to make port here, to return to their families and loved ones. She waited for the cheers of her people as the sailors returned safely home.

She waited for a particular smiling face, with bright blue eyes and messy black hair, whom she had been dreaming of every day since he left nearly one year ago.

Emma shivered and crossed her arms over her chest to fight the cold, the window not protecting her too much from the cold outside. It was typically her favorite time of the year, watching the snow fall and being able to throw snowballs at passing guards. But it was not the same. Her partner in crime was away, a lieutenant in her Royal Navy, and she feared she would never see him again.

War had been threatening her parents’ kingdom for a long time, and Emma feared that it had finally come, taking her dear Killian away.

Emma shook her head, as if that would push the thoughts away. But they returned-as they always did-and Emma decided to just go to bed with a heavy sigh. The midwinter ball was just the next night and her mother would have Emma’s head if she did not get a proper night’s rest. There would be kings and queens and lords from other lands, as well as potential suitors for Emma. So to Emma’s dismay, she had to be on her best behavior, even though her mother knew that Emma did not like dealing with suitors in the least.

(Queen Snow White discovered that after a particularly handsy suitor tried to grope Emma’s ass as they danced at a ball and Emma punched him square in the nose.

Which led to a bloody nose that stained the white marble of the ballroom.

And a smug grin from Emma and King David as the man was carted out of the ballroom.)

(What twenty-six year old man was looking to court a seventeen-year-old girl anyways?)

Killian was less than pleased to hear about that little event, even though he out rightly admitted that the man was scum and that he was proud of Emma. But he reminded her that it was her job as a princess to find someone suitable for a future husband and that this could affect the potential suitors coming her way. But, Killian did stress that she had to find a man who would love and respect her and wouldn’t treat her like she was for the suitor’s own pleasures.

As it turned out, the event didn’t affect the waves of suitors coming to Emma. In fact, seeing a princess who was capable of handling herself _increased_ the number of suitors begging for Emma’s hand in marriage, much to Emma’s despair. Even after three years, Emma hadn’t chosen a suitor worthy of her affections.

And…well…Emma was completely sure about why she had yet to choose one.

None of them were Killian.

As Emma laid in her plush bed, staring up at the canopy over her bed, she couldn’t stop thinking about just when things changed between them. Or at least, when things changed for Emma. It was when he came home after a year-long voyage with a new scar on his cheek and her heart froze, thinking about all of the possible ways he could’ve earned that scar and she was _so afraid_ that he had been in mortal danger and _how could she possibly live without him_?-

(Turned out, the scar came from him carelessly shaving aboard the ship.)

(But her heart was never the same.)

She groaned as she flipped onto her side, staring across the bed to the firmly closed door, where a stream of light came into the room. She could hear the castle guards marching down the hall just outside of her door, the clattering of their armor with each step echoing throughout the stone hallway. The threat of war had sent everyone into a frenzy and with every step outside Emma’s door, her heart pounded in fear that Killian had been lost.

But she couldn’t think that way, not when dignitaries and suitors were arriving the next morning and the midwinter ball was the next night. No, Emma had to be the happy princess her mother had raised her to be.

So after twisting around restlessly, Emma finally found sleep.

<>

Emma’s maid pulled at her hair and she winced at every tug as her hair was pinned back into a braided bun. She stared out the large windows that overlooked her balcony, looking out as the snow continued to fall. The snow was undisturbed on her balcony, in large pillow-like stacks that looked as if one could comfortably sleep there. The sun was begging to be let out from behind the clouds that covered the sky, much like Emma’s mood.

She wanted to be happy for the ball tonight, as she had been looking forward to it for weeks, but the glaringly missing man who was always by her side affected her mood.

Emma had hoped he would be home for this, as he never missed a ball. But she guessed that his naval duties took precedence.

(It wasn’t as though he owed anything to the silly princess who decided to fall in love with him.)

“Is there something wrong, Highness?” Page asked as she tugged more of Emma’s hair back, her strands in contrast to Page’s olive skin.

Emma shook her head as she met Page’s eyes in the mirror, smiling weakly. “I am fine. Just anxious for the night, I suppose.”

Page nodded in the mirror, her dark eyes glancing back down to make sure there were no bumps in Emma’s hair. “I understand. I did hear that Lord Cassidy was returning for another visit. I think he’s hoping you’ll finally choose his hand in marriage.”

Emma couldn’t retain the groan that erupted from her throat. She _hated_ that snobbish man, more than she hated any other suitor who had come her way. Page laughed from behind her and Emma looked up at her, laughing under her breath. She was glad that she felt so close to her handmaiden, given that there were hardly any other women in the castle that were her age. But Page was just a year older-one and twenty years-so it felt as though Page was Emma’s own personal friend.

“I’m sorry, but I despise that man,” Emma explained briefly after their laughter calmed.

“I believe everyone but Lord Cassidy knows that,” Page replied, smiling at Emma through the mirror.

“Maybe it’s a good thing that Killian isn’t here to see him. He hates him nearly as much as I do,” Emma simply spoke and she noticed how Page’s eyebrows drew tight for a moment. Emma furrowed her own in a matching expression. “What is it, Page?”

Page bit down on her bottom lip, looking very intently down at Emma’s hair, as the bun was nearly complete. “May I speak freely, Highness?”

“Of course. And please, Page, when it’s just us, call me Emma.”

Page smiled at Emma through the mirror, but it looked almost…pained. It was tight and toothless, as though she was nervous about what she was about to say.

“Emma, Killian…he’s a good man.”

Emma nodded simply. “Yes, he is.”

Page sighed and in a conflicted move, she sat down beside Emma on the large bench in front of her vanity. Page stared down at her entangled hands, clearly anxious about what she wanted to say. Emma placed her hand over Page’s and smiled at her when Page met her eyes.

“I said speak freely, Page. Please. Tell me what it is that’s bothering you.”

“Nothing’s bothering me, Hi-Emma,” Page replied, her brown eyes remaining to be filled with anxiety. “You’ve faced endless strings of suitors-I’ve truly lost count of how many there have been-and Killian has been there from the very beginning. _Before_ the very beginning. I remember him being here when my mother first brought me to work, to train me. He was chasing you around the hallways and you two just laughed and laughed.”

Emma smiled at the memories of her young adventures with Killian. She had only been seven when they met, during an outing with her father out to the poorer outskirts of the kingdom. Killian had been ten and covered in dirt and mud as his mother ran a fruit and vegetable stall in their market. She had fainted when they were coming through and her father had hurriedly gone to her aid, leaving Emma to accompany the frightened ten-year-old who seemed lost in the world.

After his mother regained consciousness and she assured everyone she was alright-just hadn’t been able to eat that day, even though Emma and her father had suspected it had been longer than that-, Killian and she became quite close. Whenever Killian could, he would arrive at the castle to spend time with the young princess. One of their favorite games was Emma running around the castle to see if Killian could catch her, and if he did catch her, Emma would have to chase him around.

(She missed those simpler times, when she wasn’t in love with her best friend and worried about his safety on a daily basis.)

“And you two-you’ve always been so inseparable. And I’ve noticed how you get whenever he leaves with the ship and his brother. You wander around, as though you’ve lost something,” Page continued and the smile diminished from Emma’s face. “You rarely smile and you grow ten years in a single day. I can see the worry on your face about whether or not he’s going to return, especially after the recent months.”

Emma returned her hand back onto her lap and entwined her own hands, staring down at them (and wishing her hands were entwined with another’s). “I think I know where this is going.”

“My question is, Emma…is why don’t you choose Killian as your suitor?” Page finally asked, her voice soft and gentle, much like the snow outside. “He’s a good man, as you said. He is intelligent and loyal and not too hard on the eyes.” Emma laughed under her breath and Page continued. “He is a _worthy_ man. And I know he would treat you well. There is no doubt of that in my mind, Emma.”

Emma sighed and was startled to notice her vision growing blurry. She looked over at Page, who looked at Emma knowingly. _Gods_ , Emma loved him so much, but a princess could not marry a lieutenant. Her parents were expecting a prince or a lord or someone who would unite kingdoms.

(Emma tried to ignore the reason that Killian did not love her as Emma loved him.)

“My parents want me to marry someone with status, Page. I cannot marry a lieutenant or someone from the Navy,” Emma replied sadly, shrugging as though there was nothing she could do about it.

“They want you to marry someone you love, and I know that you love him,” Page disagreed, her lips slightly pursed. “And I know he loves you.”

Emma gently shook her head with a self-deprecating smile. “Not in the same way.”

“I must disagree with you on that, as well, Highness,” Page spoke with a knowing glance. Emma furrowed her eyebrows as Page stood from the bench and turned to face Emma’s bun again. “Now, I need to finish this before you’re late to your feast before the ball. Must not make Queen Snow angry today.”

Emma looked at Page through the mirror as she tugged on her hair again and arranged Emma’s bangs just over her forehead. She wondered what Page had meant by Killian loving her. There was no way that Killian saw Emma the same way she saw him. It was unspeakable and Emma would not raise her hopes just to have them dashed because of some gossip Page had told her.

No, she refused to believe that Killian loved her.

(But her heart held onto one little speck of hope, just _wishing_ Page was telling the truth.)

<> 

“ _The Jewel of the Realm is back_.”

Emma’s heart pounded when the messenger whispered that into her father’s ear, who sat to her left at the head of the table. She itched to run to the docks, ignoring the fact that she was in a gown and it was far too cold to run all of that way in non-winter clothing. But with one stern glance from her mother, Emma slumped in her seat. She wouldn’t be able to greet Killian and Liam as they stepped off of the boat and she would have to continue to be a victim of Lord Cassidy’s lecherous stare.

(If Emma truly wanted to, she would just go. But with the visitors here, she knew it would look exceptionally bad for the kingdom if their royal princess fled in the middle of their feast to commiserate with the lieutenant of the Navy’s flagship.)

(Sometimes, royal duties had to come first, even if that meant being in misery.)

Her leg jittered under the table, her impatience settling in her bones. She wanted to go-to _run_ -down to the docks. But with every sideways glance from her mother, the point was restated. Emma had to remain in the castle and entertain the visitors, much to her displeasure. She wanted to see if Killian was safe, to make sure he was actually _home_. She missed him far too much to just sit at this table and half-listen to stories of hunting and boring politics.

(She missed him far too much to be _healthy_.)

And when finally- _finally_ -the feast was declared to be over, Emma moved to rush out of the dining room. But her mother called to her and Emma turned to look at Queen Snow.

“You need to dress for the ball now. You’ll see Killian after the ball,” Queen Snow spoke in a determined voice and Emma knew there was no way to argue. On days of festivities, Queen Snow was not a woman to be trifled with.

On days _without_ festivities, Queen Snow was not a woman to be trifled with.

Thusly, Emma dejectedly walked through the halls, weaving around her guests to avoid Lord Cassidy, and walked upstairs. Her heels clacked against the stone stairs and against the stone hallways. She did not find any silence even as she stepped into her bedroom, finding Page already waiting there with her ball gown on the bed. She stood with her hands behind her back and a smile on her face, which wavered when she saw Emma’s sad face.

“What’s wrong?” Page asked softly as Emma slid her shoes off and walked over to the gown.

“I can’t see Killian yet,” Emma replied just as softly.

Page nodded. “Ah yes. The ship arrived back while you were in the feast.”

“Did you go down there?” Emma asked, meeting her handmaiden’s eyes.

She nodded and Emma’s heart soared. “Yes. Everyone returned safe and sound.”

Emma couldn’t hide the smile that spread on her face. “Killian?”

Page smiled back and nodded. “He’s alright. Asked about you, of course. He wanted to go see you, but I told him you were in the middle of the feast.”

Emma sighed and nodded in understanding. “He knew not to go to the feast. Only the captain would’ve been allowed in.”

“He did seem rather sad about not seeing you,” Page mentioned as she moved behind Emma and undid the lacings of the lavender dress. “I saw him stand on the plank to go onto the dock and he looked over everyone’s heads, looking for you. He spotted me quickly, but looked relatively dejected.”

“He did?” Emma asked, looking over her shoulder as Page continued to unlace her dress.

“Yes. Does that truly surprise you?”

Emma sighed as she quickly thought it over. “I suppose not.”

Emma tugged her arms out of the sleeves as the dress loosened and soon, it dropped to the floor in a puddle of satin. Page walked around and grabbed the ball gown from the bed, lowering it down toward Emma’s feet so she could step into it. The ice blue fabric flowed outwards, but not too much to make Emma look large. As Page did in the lacing, Emma held the corseted top to help Page. It was one of Emma’s favorite dresses, and she was very excited to finally wear it.

(And when she helped the seamstress design it, she had hoped Killian would see her in it.)

(She still hoped.)

“All done,” Page said as she gave the dress one final tug, squeezing Emma’s rib cage and tied the laces. She came back to Emma’s front and smiled widely. “You look beautiful.”

Emma smiled back at Page. “Thank you, Page.”

Page showed Emma to the mirror beside the vanity beside the doors to her balcony, allowing Emma to see her full beauty. And Emma was astonished. The dress hugged her hips and breasts, but not too tightly to the point where she couldn’t breathe. The dress shot out from her hips, but not too far. It draped beautifully to the floor, diamonds sewn into the fabric for the illusion that Emma was walking among the snow.

“Just wait until Killian sees you,” Page spoke as her hands rested on Emma’s shoulders. “He’s going to be shocked.”

“If he decides to arrive at the ball tonight,” Emma murmured, doubt lacing itself in her tone.

“He’ll be there if he knows what’s good for him,” Page replied with a wide smile.

<> 

Nearly an hour into the ball and Killian still hadn’t arrived.

Emma walked around the large ballroom, smiling and chatting with her guests as she made her rounds. She made eye contact every once and a while with her mother, who would look at her sternly. Queen Snow knew how badly Emma wanted to see Killian, but Emma had to remain at the ball to show a strong front for the kingdom. With war threatening the kingdom every day, these dignitaries and lords and royalty had to know that Misthaven remained to hold strong.

But with every glance to the wide open doors of the ballroom, Emma’s heart broke a little more.

She just wanted to see her friend again, but with each passing moment, it seemed less and less likely that it would happen.

“It’s unfortunate to see such a beautiful woman looking so sad,” A voice spoke from Emma’s side and she retained the urge to roll her eyes.

“Hello, Lord Cassidy,” Emma begrudgingly spoke, turning to meet his lecherous eyes. “I hope you are having a fine time tonight.”

“I would have a finer time if you would share a dance with me,” Lord Cassidy replied, stepping forward and offering a hand to Emma.

No part of Emma wanted to take his hand and dance with him across the marble floor of the ballroom. But she looked over his shoulder and met her mother’s gaze from across the room and Emma knew that it was something she had to do. It would be frowned upon if her guests saw Emma deny Lord Cassidy’s request, which could hurt their chances at alliances if war rained down on Misthaven.

With an internal sigh, Emma placed her hand in Lord Cassidy’s and ignored the smirk that spread on his face. She held her head high as he led her to the center of the ballroom, to dance among the fellow couples. But Emma refused to meet anyone’s gaze, keeping her head even but her eyes unfocused. She did not want anybody to believe that she was accepting Lord Cassidy’s incessant proposals.

(Over her dead body.)

He twirled Emma into his arms, placing his hand very low on her back. Emma clenched her jaw tightly to keep herself from yelling in his face about a decent place for his hand, resting her hand within his and on his shoulder. Lord Cassidy’s body radiated warmth as he slowly began dancing Emma around the room, his body moving closer and closer to her with every step. She cringed whenever she met his eyes, watching as he eyed her body with obvious lust that Emma wanted no part of.

“You look beautiful tonight, Princess Emma,” Lord Cassidy spoke over the cacophony of the music. “That dress fits you well.”

“Thank you, Lord Cassidy,” Emma replied through clenched teeth, her eyes drifting over the crowd for a particularly familiar face that she yearned to see.

“Who are you looking for, Princess? All you need is right in front of you,” Lord Cassidy stated and a smirk crossed his face. “Don’t tell me you have your eye on dumb prince or elderly king.”

“I have my eye on any other man that isn’t you,” Emma responded under her breath as Lord Cassidy twirled Emma around the room.

He laughed under his breath as his hand trailed lower, firm against her lower back. “When are your games going to end, Emma-”

“It’s Princess Emma to you, Lord Cassidy,” Emma interrupted him, her eyes jerking up to his. “And if your hand moves any lower, I’ll cut it off.”

“How frightening,” Lord Cassidy chuckled and his hand moved even lower. “Your version of foreplay is exciting, I must say.”

“I will kill you.”

“And ruin the potential alliance with my kingdom? I never thought you were _that_ idiotic,” Lord Cassidy taunted Emma, his lecherous smile reappearing on his face. “Now, how about a wedding in the spring? Wouldn’t that be beautiful?”

Emma clenched her jaw again and her hand itched to reach out and punch the bastard right in the throat. But before she allowed her thoughts to take over her fist, a gentle voice spoke from Emma’s side.

“Excuse me, but may I have this dance with the princess?” A gentle lilted voice spoke and Emma looked to her right, her heart pounding when she realized _Killian was here_.

“I’m sorry, but we’re-”

“Of course you can, Lieutenant,” Emma interrupted Lord Cassidy again, removing her hands from him. He stared daggers at her and reluctantly removed his hands from Emma. As he moved away, Lord Cassidy murmured something under his breath about _puppy dog lieutenant_ and _she’s a harlot_. Before Emma could reach around and punch him square in the nose, Killian swept Emma into his arms and moved her away from Lord Cassidy’s foul words.

“Bloody scoundrel,” Killian muttered out, his jaw clenched as he looked across the ballroom. “I saw him with his hand indecently low and practically breathing down your dress and I had to do something.”

“I can handle myself, Killian.”

“Oh, I’m well aware of that fact, Princess Emma,” Killian responded, looking back over at Emma and smiling. “But it also gave me the opportunity to sweep you into my arms and tell you how stunning you look tonight.”

Emma felt a blush fill her cheeks as she moved her hand further up Killian’s shoulder. “Page said you’d enjoy the dress.”

Killian smiled again and stared at Emma with his sparkling blue eyes, an emotion swimming in their depths that nearly gave Emma hope. “She was right, as always.”

Emma moved with Killian in a familiar way, as he had been her dance partner whenever she needed the lessons as she grew up. He moved her around the room, twirling her around in circles in this romantic dance that Emma truly wanted to be reciprocated. His eyes never wavered from hers and blush filled Emma’s cheeks yet again. She dared to hope that he loved her as much as she loved him, but Emma was still afraid.

Afraid of the war that threatened her land.

Afraid of the war that threatened to take him away from her.

“I missed you,” Emma spoke under her breath, the air weighing heavily on her and she nearly couldn’t breathe.

“I believe I missed you more,” Killian replied back, his smile weakening.

“And I believe that that is impossible.”

Killian’s smile returned and spread widely on his face. “Well, who am I to dispute the Princess’ claim?”

Emma smiled back just as widely. “Just an intelligent lieutenant who knows what’s good for him.”

“I cannot dispute that,” Killian replied as his hand remained firm against Emma’s back.

And with how Killian stared at her, his eyes bright and _loving_ , Emma felt her heart pound against her ribs in a hurried beat. She looked up at him and…she saw a future that she itched to have with _him_. She saw him waking up beside her every morning with his wild hair; she saw him returning home from his time at sea and her jumping into his arms in a loving embrace; she saw a little girl with hair as dark as night and eyes as green as the summer grass, running into his arms.

Emma saw _everything_ that she wanted with just a simple meeting of their eyes. She wanted to forget about being the princess and forget about the war that may be coming to her kingdom and she just wanted to be happy with the man that she loved.

(Even if he may not love her in return.)

The air grew heavy on Emma’s chest and she felt as though she couldn’t breathe. Seeing those emotions swimming in Killian’s eyes made Emma believe in a future that she was not sure would ever come to pass, and she had to protect her heart from the possible heartbreak of loving a man who loved the sea more than his own life.

(Maybe she should accept Lord Cassidy’s proposal. He’s _safe_ and would not break her heart clean in two.)

“I need some air,” Emma murmured, removing her hands from Killian and hurriedly walking out of the double doors in the rear of the ballroom.

As soon as she stepped out onto the rear balcony, which overlooked the ocean, Emma breathed in the brisk winter air deeply. She immediately began to shiver and decided to fold her bare arms over her chest, moving to stand by the stone wall that came up to her hips. Emma looked out at the crashing, angry waves and tried to ease her mind. The snow continued to fall while Emma tried to reason with herself as to why Lord Cassidy was most likely her best suitor.

He belonged to one of the largest kingdoms, with a strong military and a sizeable wealth that their royalty had accumulated over centuries of taxes and taking over lesser kingdoms. Emma knew that marrying Lord Cassidy would form a strong alliance, which was needed for the possible incoming war. As Emma thought of these things, it began to seem reasonable that Emma would choose Lord Cassidy as her future husband.

(She was sure she would grow to love him, after her heart moved on from Killian.)

Emma felt the draping of a thick, wool fabric over her shoulders. She looked over and saw Killian standing at her side, looking out at the ocean in a thin white shirt. Emma reached up and felt his blue Navy jacket on her shoulders, the scratch of the wool comforting against her bare shoulders.

“Would you like to tell me what’s on your mind, Highness?” Killian spoke by her side, looking over at her as snowflakes stuck themselves in his black hair.

Emma chewed on the inside of her cheek, looking back out at the blackish waves crashing below them. “I’m considering accepting Lord Cassidy’s hand.”

“Why would you want to do that?” Killian asked nearly immediately, his voice noticeably tighter than previously. His hatred for Lord Cassidy was not news to Emma; he was the first person to voice his displeasure about the unchaste lord.

“We need alliances, Killian, and me marrying him would unite our kingdoms. We need the support and we need their military-”

“I asked ‘why would you _want_ to marry him’, not ‘why you _should_ ,’” Killian repeated and Emma looked back over at Killian. She could see the rigidity of his shoulders, telling Emma that he very much did not like the idea of her marrying Lord Cassidy.

Emma gulped back the knot in her throat and knew that there was no reason as to why she would _want_ to marry the licentious man. Well…the only reason Emma could think of was that she didn’t want to experience the heartbreak of loving a man who was sure to be lost to the sea or war because of his dedication to her kingdom. And if Emma chose Lord Cassidy…she wouldn’t have to face the inevitable loss of Killian.

She had to choose Lord Cassidy to keep her own heart safe.

“Emma, I know you too well and I know how you hate him deeply,” Killian continued, stepping slightly closer. “I know there is no part of you that wants to marry him. And you shouldn’t marry him purely because of how it’ll help the kingdom. You know your parents wouldn’t wish that on you. They want you to marry out of _love_ , not to build an alliance for a war that may not come.

“Please tell me, Emma: _why do you want to marry him_?”

Emma wanted to tell Killian everything; how she loved him and wanted to be with him and how every time she looked at him, she could only think of how she wanted to see his face first thing in the morning and she wanted his face to be the last thing she saw at night.

But she had to protect herself.

“Why do you care so much, Killian?” Emma asked, her eyes gazing up at his as the snow continued to fall steadily.

Killian breathed out heavily, a gentle puff of white in the air. “Because I don’t want to see the woman I love marry a lord who would undoubtedly break her heart by sleeping with half of his kingdom and render her stuck in an unhappy marriage.”

Emma’s heart froze and her mouth opened slightly in a silent gasp because she could not believe her ears. “What?”

Killian’s jaw clenched as he turned his head to look out over the balcony, his eyes angry as if Emma’s response was not what he wanted. “I only wish for you to be happy, Highness. If that means you marry Lord Cassidy, then I suppose I should step out of the way.”

Killian stepped away, tucking his hands into his pant pockets. He looked sadder than Emma had ever seen, utterly dejected and withdrawn and Emma wanted to _fix_ this. She needed to tell him how she felt for him, that she loved him _so_ much and since he loved her back, she was no longer afraid. Emma knew that he would never leave her willingly, that he would fight as hard as he could to remain by her side until they were old and gray. Emma had seen how Killian had loved with his whole heart, so passionately and strongly, and Emma knew he would love her till the end of days.

She couldn’t let him leave, when she had so much left unsaid.

“Killian, wait!” Emma called out and hurried forward, her hand finding Killian’s as he walked toward the doors. He turned back to face her, his face fallen and weary, and she couldn’t hold back any longer.

Emma stepped into his space and onto her tiptoes, pressing her lips against his to show that _she loved him back_. Her hands curled around the thin material of Killian’s shirt and she tugged him closer to her, his lips finally moving against hers in a way that only the two of them knew. His teeth nipped at her bottom lip and Emma sighed against him, her body melting into his hands as they wrapped around her back.

With every motion of their lips and tongues tangling together, Emma saw new flashes of their future. She could see him kissing her on the cheek first thing in the morning, and them sharing a bath at night as they stared at the falling snow. She could see them standing on this very balcony after their wedding dance, watching the waves crash against each other.

She could see him holding their first child after a long night of labor, staring down at their child with eyes filled with love.

Emma pulled away with a smile on her face, her hands remaining wrapped in his shirt. Killian leaned his forehead against hers and she could nearly hear the pounding of his own heart. As the snow began to fall more quickly from the sky, Emma opened her eyes and took a deep breath because _he was finally hers_.

“Page was right,” Emma spoke with finality, her smile unmoving from her lips.

Killian laughed and pulled away slightly, looking down into Emma’s eyes with a wide smile. “As she always is, my love.” His smile faded slightly as his thumbs rubbed against the fabric of the jacket. “However, there is a question that I must ask: why do you want to marry Lord Cassidy?”

“I was afraid,” Emma replied quietly, her hands drifting down toward the bottom of Killian’s shirt. She pressed her forehead against his again, her eyes downward as to not meet his eyes. “I’ve loved you so much for so long and I was afraid, Killian. I was afraid of losing you to this war or to the sea or merely losing you because you didn’t love me back. I thought it would be easier for me if I just chose a man who was safe and would help the kingdom.”

“Emma,” Killian spoke gently as his hands moved to cup Emma’s face in his hands. “Emma, I have loved you since I was ten years old and you kept me busy while your father helped my mother. You helped me not be afraid that day and I realized then that I never wanted to let you out of my sight. I love you, Princess Emma, and I always will. And if you so desire, I will ask your parents for their permission to court you.”

“Of course I desire it, Killian. That’s all I’ve wanted for so long-”

Killian ducked back down and kissed Emma, as though his life would surely end if he stopped. Emma wrapped her arms around his waist, pulling him closer as she moaned against him. His tongue swept against hers and her knees turned watery with the bolt of lust that shot through her body. Her teeth grazed Killian’s lip and the sound that Killian made was something Emma would remember for the rest of her life.

Killian’s lips pulled away from hers and he shivered wildly and Emma suddenly remembered that he was standing out in the winter snow without a coat. Emma reached up to her shoulders and gave the jacket back to Killian, who graciously took it as he guided her toward the double doors.

“I do have one final question, love.”

“What is it?”

Killian turned to stand beside Emma as they stood by the glass doors, a grin spreading on his lips. She looked at him and itched to kiss him again, even though the guests of the ball had taken to staring at them through the glass panes of the doors and windows. But Emma could not stop herself from running her hand down the thin material of his white shirt, which was exposed by his unbuttoned jacket.

“What took you so bloody long?”


End file.
